Things written down since I am old and may soon be prone to forgetfulness - posted at 17:37

Seen and heard on my birthday:

Stacey: what would you say to some hot saucer action tonight?
Stacey: perhaps some brindles action too
Adrienne: mmm
Stacey: i haven't been in a while
Stacey: and there is no better time for, uhm, having trouble remembering the name of that deadly sin, the one where you eat too much, than your birthday
Stacey: sorry, that made NO SENSE
Adrienne: gluttony
Stacey: yes! that one!

Jordan: You look HOT! Oh, and happy birthday!

Laura: I'm old!
Stacey: You're old? You're 21, and Jordan, you're 20! I'm 23! Two times 23 is 46! I'm four years from 50!
Laura: You're right! You are old!
Jordan: No no, you're two years from fifty, because two plus twenty-three is twenty-five, and twice that is fifty!
Stacey: On no! I'm two years from fifty!

[The scene: Mike and I are eating a puff-pastry dessert at the Metropolitain when the Pastry Chef, masquerading as just another employee (but I am not fooled because I have seen him there before. Pay homage to the Pastry Chef) approaches.]
Pastry Chef: How is everything?
Stacey: Mmm. Very good!
Pastry Chef: Thank you. [Walks away]
Stacey (to Mike): That's right! He can say "thank you" to that question because he's the Pastry Chef! I love the Pastry Chef.

The last one is going to be way too much information for most of you, but is recorded here for posterity's sake:

Me (to Mike): I'm getting so old. By next week I'm going to be taking my teeth out and putting them in a glass when I go down on you!
Mike: Mmm, gums!